Chasing You
by Scorpiuslvr23
Summary: Astoria's world came to an end when Draco Malfoy left her to be "something better". After a summer of trying to move on, what will she do when he returns to make his way back into her life again?
1. Prologue

_I dont in anyway own Harry Potter or anything that J.K Rowling has written. This starts off at the end of the 6th book. _

* * *

_Astoria's POV_

I sat, looking out the window of my dormitory. I knew that my searching for any sign of him was a lost cause. Sadness and anger washed over me, and I felt a strange sensation to my eyes. I hesitantly put a hand to my eye, and it felt...wet. Bloody hell, was I crying? Several girls who share my dormitory walked in and gasped.

"Astoria what's wrong?"

I was too upset to respond, or even look up to see who had asked. For them it was unusual for me to look so low. I was usually all smiles, or I at least tried to be. Once they realized that they would not get a response, they whispered reasons why I might be so upset.

"...probably for Professor Dumbledore..."

"...did you hear that Professor Snape killed him?"

What they didn't know was that as upsetting as it may be, I wasn't crying over Professor Dumbledore's death. I was crying for the one and only boy that ever got to me. I had to come to terms that he is now a bloody death eater. I saw him fight and leave with a bunch of them, and now I tried my best to accept the truth. _He's gone. _I held in a sob. I thought of all we had been through together. I yearned so badly to feel the warmth of his arms around me. Then it hit me. I felt angry. No, more then angry. I hated him, and I hated the way he made me feel. I left my spot next to the window, and all the girls looked up from their conversation.

"Are you feeling better?"

"I think it's time to move on," mumbling to myself more than answering their question.

"Move on from what?"

"Disappointment I guess."

I crawled into my bed, and knew that with the hatred I also felt something more. _Love. _I was an idiot to think he was better then what everyone said he was, and to have allowed myself to love a monster like him. I shut my eyes away from the rest of the world, and saw his face. In some strange way that was comforting.

* * *

_Draco's POV_

I continued to move away from Hogwarts, and with that I knew I continued to move away from her. _Her. _This wasnt suppose to be so complicated, but the look on her face when she saw me exit Hogwarts...I can't event

I could feel tears coming to my eyes, but stopped myself, realizing that I was being a freaking pussy.

With all of this emotion and confusion rushing into to me, I could barely tolerate my aunt Bellatrix and her constant singing.

"Would you shut the hell up!" I blurted out.

"You are so serious Draco. You need to learn how to play as long as your with us."

The others ignored Bellatrix and looked straight ahead. My aunt seemed to be happy to cause my frustration, which easily aggravated me.

_As long as your one of us. I_ was one of them now. This is what I wanted all year, and this is what i've been waiting for. I knew that a part of me wanted to stay at Hogwarts...but I soon concluded that this was ridiculous because there would be plenty of girls out there for me, and much better looking too. She was _nothing b_ut a stupid love interest. Or at least...that's what I was trying to convince himself


	2. Time

I do not own Harry Potter.

* * *

_2 and a half months later (time sets in the beginning of book 7)_

_Astoria's POV_

Summer came and went. My parents being pureblood extremists were not at all mourning Dumbledore's death. Most people would be surprised that this bothered me. I was nothing at all like my parents and even my sister Daphne. I am the first one to sorted into a house other then Slytherin in my family.

I was sorted into Ravenclaw, but I didn't feel so bad about not being sorted into Slytherin. Of course my sister Daphne, and her Slytherin friends made fun of me for being the oddball in the Greengrass family...especially Pansy Parkinson. The thought Pansy reminded me of **him**.

All summer I had been thinking about him...wondering where he was, or if he was okay. I wanted nothing more then to look into his eyes and know that he was safe.

So there I was on platform 9 3/4. I turned to my parents to give them my goodbye, and their faces were cold as usual.

"Bye," I said weakly.

Both of them looked at each other and nodded. They didn't seem to want to say any formal goodbyes so I took it as my turn to leave. I walked into the platform wall leaving them and the muggle world behind.

There were half the people that there were during previous years boarding the Hogwart's Express. This did not surprise me what so ever.

After 10 minutes I started to worry that I wouldent find any one I was friends with. To my luck I found my friend Sam from Ravenclaw, but by then it was 5 minutes until the train left. While dropping off our luggage I looked out the corner of my eye and caught sight of...pale blond hair.

"Draco" I muttered.

A rush of adrenaline and emotion swept through my body. He must have been merely 20 feet away. All I could see was his back, but I knew it was him. Before I realized what I was doing I was sprinting halfway down the platform.

"ASTORIA!" Sam shouted.

I didn't hear her. All I could do was run after him. I ran into a crowd of 2nd years, pushing and shoving to get through, and I got out of the crowd and looked around.

He was gone and no where to be seen. Tears began to sting my eyes. I just stood there looking like a utter idiot for what it seemed like 700 years. Eventually I turned around and realized the Hogwarts Express was about to leave.

"Fuck!" I muttered.

I barely made it on, but thankfully I soon found Sam waiting for me in a compartment.

"What the hell was that about?"

I ignored her and looked out the window. I was so angry with myself. It probably wasn't him. How could I be so impulsive?

* * *

_Flashback_

_Draco's POV_

He caught me from the waist behind and pulled me down on the grass. May was such beautiful month. The temperature was warm, and the Hogwart's grounds were so beautifully green. I smiled up at him.

We had only been a couple for 2 months, but it felt like a lifetime. We did not see much of each other at school since no one knew we were going out...no one can know we're going out. Technically he's suppose to be with Pansy. I wrinkled my nose at the thought of her and her shrilly voice.

As we cuddled together under the sun, I remembered something I needed to ask. A spike of sadness washed through my mind.

"What's with the frown?" he asked.

"Can I ask you something?"

He cocked an eyebrow. I was sort of hesitant to ask him, because I was afraid of the answer.

"Are you not coming back to Hogwarts next year?"

He understood where I was getting at.

"I...you know what they want me to do."

"I know, but I don't want you to go anywhere." I mumbled into his chest

"I can't do anything about it. I'm sorry but you know I can't. You know that I have to do it...what they will do to me if I can't follow through."

"I know...but...well...don't you love me enough to stay?" I blushed.

He seemed to struggle for an answer.

"I'm not sure. I hate this stupid school. There would have to be a more important reason to stay." He replied.

_Owch. _His words were like a thousand daggers stabbing me slowly and painfully. I couldn't handle this...us.. him.. it was too much, so I got up to leave.

"Wait!" he caught my hand.

I turned around and looked into his beautiful grayish blue eyes.

"I won't leave you, I promise."


	3. Reflection

I do not own Harry Potter

* * *

_Astoria's POV_

Girls can be known to do strange things, or act out on emotion. I was never one of those girls. So then why is it that I'm standing in front of a mirror, in just my underwear, while examining myself? I've seen girls in my dorm do this sometimes. They evaluate themselves as if to check to see all their body parts were in place. But it feels awkward looking at myself because well... I'm an awkward person.

I guess you could say that I have my good and bad aspects. My dark brown hair, almost black in color, used to be extremely out of control. Most people found this quite odd, because my sister Daphne had platinum blonde, long "princess hair". Thankfully the summer before last, my friend Sam had told me about this anti-frizz charm she used, and lets just say it worked quite well. Notoriously crazy hair became some what shiny and soft. Another well known characteristic of mine is my extremely pale skin. Some of my friends have expressed their envy of my skin, but I honestly don't know why. Sure I've never had problems with acne, or facial blemishes, but I can't come in contact with the sun unless I put myself under an anti-burning charm, or put on 20 layers of this muggle substance called "suncreen" on every inch of my skin.

I guess you can say that I am well, just average.

Someone behind me wolf whistled and I realized that my dormitory friends were watching me from behind.

Suddenly embarrassed, I blushed a deep red, and covered myself with a bathrobe.

To be honest my behavior has been out of wack lately

I have not only have I been frequently doing strange thing, but I've also been having dreams about **him.** I've been waking up from these dreams all sweaty and almost close to tears. I know it's ridiculous to act this way over one boy, but my emotions are getting the best of me.

_*FLASHBACK*  
(Dracos POV)_

_1 year ago. Draco's 6th year_

Breakfast was the same bloody shit. Even though I skipped dinner last night, I have no appetite. I'm never hungry anymore. Coming back to Hogwarts this year has made me more anxious. I don't know if I can fulfill the dark lord' s wishes, and I constantly worry of what he will do if I don't complete what I was chosen to do. Although, I was happy about one thing. After this year I could don't have to come back to this pathetic excuse for a school again.

"Draco why arn't you eating? Are you alright? Do you want to talk? Are you sick?"

I didn't bother to confront Pansy and her constant nagging about my personal health and welfare.

"I'm fine" I mumbled to her.

"Do you want me to feed you?" she asked.

Does she think I'm a fucking two year old?

"I said I'm fine!" I snapped.

She seemed to get the message and didn't speak again. It wasn't long before a 5th year Ravenclaw girl caught my attention. Astoria gracefully glided to her house table, and greeted her friends. Damn. I realized how much she changed in one summer. Late bloomer, but her new good looks made up for it. Her hair was more controlled, and thank god... it almost got as bad as Granger's. Her body was also gained some curves. The new aspects of her looks made me take notice to things that had always been there, like her smile, or the way her bright blue eyes would sparkle when she laughed.

I caught her eye, and she noticed I was staring at her.

"Draco are you listening to me?! Who are you starring at!?" Pansy shrilled.

I haden't noticed Pansy was talking to me, and she took notice to who had my attention.

"Why are you staring at HER like that!?"

"I can look at whatever I want to without your permission Parkinson, so shut the hell up!" I retorted.

Always one to make a scene. Pancy exited the Great Hall a crying mess. Whatever, she'll come back to me.

I went back to staring at Astoria, and found that she was still looking at me. After a few moments she blinked her eyes, looked away and blushed. I didn't know that much about her other then she was a 5th year, in Ravenclaw, and Daphne's little sister. I found myself wanting to know more.


	4. Returning

I do not own Harry Potter

* * *

_*Dracos POV*_

"Draco.."

I looked up in fear. He never addressed me directly before.

"Yes my lord."

"You are to go back to Hogwarts to assist the Carrows and Snape."

Fuck! I don't want to go back! The whole reason why I left in the first place was on the understanding that I never had to return. But I didn't dare to say this out loud in front of the Dark Lord.

"Draco, I sense that you are disappointed with this assignment?" Voldemort asked with a slight frown.

My Aunt Bellatrix smirked.

"No my lord."

"Don't lie Draco! I can sense your resentment in my request. Are you not grateful for being able to serve me?"

"No my lord, I am very grateful," now I was starting to get worried.

"My Lord please," my father chimed in. "Draco is very happy to serve you."

"Is that so Lucius? Maybe you should teach your son to show more enthusiasm, for I have forgiven your family too many times." Voldemort hissed. "This meeting is over."

My family left the room.

"Draco I will not have you embarrass our family again. You are going to Hogwarts and fulfilling the Dark Lords wishes. We cannot have the Dark lord doubting our ability to serve him! Do you understand how important this is?"

"Yes Father."

* * *

_*Astorias POV*  
_  
The past month at Hogwarts has turned into chaos. These death eaters called "Carrows" broke in, killed all the aurors protecting Hogwarts, and have basically taken over. The old Potions master professor Snape, who is now a death eater, is our new headmaster. The other teachers seem to have no choice but to stick around and try to go on teaching as best they can. Also they have set new rules saying that only halfbloods and purebloods can attend Hogwarts. They've taken all the muggle borns and have sent them home, along with Sam, my closest friend I had left here. Hogwarts is even emptier now then ever. I can't go back home because my parents would never allow me to drop out of school, they seem to like the idea of death eaters running the place, and that I wouldent be going to school with muggle borns anymore. But in actuality, I would rather stay here then go back to them. Hogwarts was still my home.

* * *

_*Astorias POV*_

"Students tell me one unforgivable curse." The Carrow Amycus commanded.

This seemed odd considering we had learned about unforgivable curses already. So I raised my hand.

"Yes?"

"Well, erm, Professor we learned about unforgivable curses last year."

The Carrow raised an eyebrow and smirked.

"Yes silly girl, but you didn't learn how to _use_ them."

Everyone gasped.

"But that's illegal!" someone shouted.

"You cant expect us to perform them!" another protested.

"What kind of teacher are you?" I asked in disgust.

Though some people were uneasy by this lesson, including me, the Slytherins seemed to be quite okay with it.

"SILENCE!" The Carrow shouted.

Everyone went quite.

"You!" He pointed at me. "What is your name?"

"Astoria" I replied

"Well since you were the first to speak you'll be the first to demonstrate."

He came over and grabbed my arm, pulling me up to the front of the class.

"Bring him in Alecto!" The Carrow called.

The other Carrow was his sister Alecto. She was just as cruel, and maybe even worse. She brought in this boy, almost dragging him. He seemed to have a black eye, and had injured his ankle, because he was limping.

"Now girl, name one unforgivable curse."

Terrified; I knew whatever curse I named was the curse they would make me perform, so I chose the one that would cause the poor boy less pain.

"Answer me!"

"Theimperiuscurse." I mumbled very softly.

"Speak up you stupid girl!"

"The imperius curse" I stated more clearly.

"Good. Now focus on something that you want this boy to do very clearly."

I couldent believe I was actually doing this."

"Now do it."

I looked at the boy, who looked away from me, and felt sorry for him. Moments went by and I was just staring at the floor.

"DO IT!"

"I….I cant."

"Stupid girl! Crucio!"

Pain spread all over my body and before you know it I was twitching on the floor. I wished for some one to just put me out of my misery. I couldn't tell what I was doing, or screaming, I could only focus on the pain. Then I heard a voice that had broken through all the pain and suffering I was feeling.

"Leave her alone Amycus." Draco said.


	5. Ghost

I do not own Harry Potter

* * *

_*Astoria's POV*_

I must have stood there for hours, or at least it felt like it. Was I just imagining this? Have I finally gone crazy? I must have, because I can't bring myself to accpet that after all this time he is standing right here in front of me.

"Malfoy? Why are you here? Did your daddy get so peeved with you that he sent you back to school?" Alecto mocked in a baby voice.

"No, actually the Dark Lord himself asked me to babysit you." Draco replied. They both scowled darkely.

"We do not need a immature boy to look after us us! You need to get in check with your arrogance before the Dark Lord does!" Amycus hissed.

"Well If you don't mind then, Snape wants to see her." he changed the subject and pointed at me.

"We are in the middle of a lesson!"

"Strict orders. Do you want me to get Snape so he can tell you himself?" Draco asked.

They both looked disappointed. Probably because they woulden't get the chance to "punish" me.

"Astoria..." Draco nodded his head towards the door.

Still in shock, it took me a while to process what just happened.

"Go you silly girl!" said Alecto.

I walked out of the room with Draco. Once we were out of the room he suddenly turned around, causing me to almost crash into him.  
"Snape doesn't actually want to see you, I was just doing you a favor, so you can go now."

I didnt notice what he said, I was just looking into his face trying to memorize every line and feature. His pale blue greyish eyes, his silky blonde hair, and his masculine features. Afraid that his face would dissapear again, I refused to look away.

"Why...why are you here?" I asked hesitantly.

"Like I said ealier, the Dark Lord sent me here."

"The...the...Dark Lord?...so it's true then? Your a death eater."

He didn't reply, or seem to make any sort of emotion, but I knew it was true, I've known this since he left. I was aware of the fact that he just had showed up out of no where, without a warning, which angered me a little. But this confrontation was ripping me apart.

"You know, I didn't use to think you could be a death eater, but I guess you proved me wrong. You also promised me you would never leave me, and for a while I believed you. I guess you also proved me wrong on that. I haven't seen you in months, and you never wrote to me after you left. Right now I don't even know who you are!"

It was true, the Draco Malfoy I fell in love with wasn't a death eater, or at least that's what I was trying to tell myself.

"Then I guess we never knew each other... this has always been me." he said coldly.

Tears were stinging in my eyes. He was breaking my heart all over again. Anger then took control.

"For a while I thought I was beginning to move on, and now you just had to ruin it! I HATE YOU! YOU FUCKING DEATH EATER!" I shouted.

For a split second an expression of pain appeared on his face, but he quickly controlled it.

"You know what Greengrass I never wanted to come back! In fact, I never ever wanted to see your ugly face again! I'm going to leave this pathetic place as soon as I can, I promise you that!"

Before I knew what I was doing my hand reacted and slapped him, and I was running while the tears were spilling over my face.

* * *

_*Draco's POV*_

My hand went to the place were she had slapped me. At first I had the urge to hit her back, but I found restraint. The last time I was hit was when that mudblood, Granger, broke my nose. Though this time the touch was more painful. It wasn't just the pain that came from her hitting me...

Fuck. What the hell was I doing?

I was storming through the hallways, and went to 'the place". The place always calmed me down when I was angry. The place is a medow outside in the forest area. It was a place no one knew of besides me, well except for **her.**

I was walking towards the place, and I saw a shadow figure sitting on the grassy area. I ducked and hid behind a tree. As I looked closer I saw it was her. Anger built up inside me just looking at her. I was about to tell her to piss off, but then I heard her talking to herself...great the bitch was a bloody lunatic. Well she was until I heard what she was saying...

"Why did it have to be him! Please make me forget about him! It hurts to much!" and I could hear the tears in her voice.

It wasn't until then that I realized how much pain she was in. I didn't want to care...but I did.


	6. A New Start

Hello everyone! So I decided to update pretty fast, because this week will be pretty busy for me, and I probably won't get a chance to update again this week. Sorry! But hopefully this chapter will tide you all over for a week. This chapter is a tad bit longer than the others.

I do not own Harry Potter

* * *

_*Astoria's POV*_

So stupid. It's close to dark, i've skipped dinner, and I'm walking back by myself. I had spent about 5 hours in "the place". His words replaying over and over in my head. "**_I never wanted to see your god damn face ever again!_**". **_"Then I guess we never knew each other, this has always been me." _**

Before, I thought I had a chance to move on from him. But after today I don't know if I can.

But I was enjoying my walk through the corridors. You could see the stars shine from outside, and the moonlight.

"Astoria!"

I turned around to see who called. It was a boy from Hufflepuff, Evan Lewis.

"What brings you to the corridors during after hours?" I asked.

"Snuck into the kitchens. They're serving some real rubbish for meals these days, so I have the house elves give me some real food. Speaking of food, I didn't see you at dinner."

I was surprised he even noticed.

"Oh..yeah...female issues. You know how that is" I replied.

"I sure I do," he said sarcastically. "So how are you doing?"

"I've been better."

"Anything you want to talk about?"

"Not really," I answered.

"Okay well, since you skipped dinner, fancy a pastry?"

He pulled out a pastry from his stuffed pockets. Looking at it, I realized how hungry I was.

"You have no idea how grateful I am right now," and I grabbed it out of his hand.

"No problem."

For a second we just stared at each other. Even though I had known him since 1st year, I never realized how good looking, with light brown curly hair, and very green eyes. His gaze was alluring, and I found myself almost feeling...

"You two! What are you doing in the corridors after hours!" Alecto yelled.

"Oh sorry, Professor Sprout wanted to talk to us about our school work and she kept us late. We were just walking back to our dormitories now." Evan replied.

I admired how he was able to make up a story that fast with no hesitation.

"Get back to your dormitories If I catch you two lingering about again there will be punishment."

Not bothering to respond, we turned around and headed to our dormitories.

"Nice one," I complimented.

"Oh, well im a good liar"

He then flashed an attractive smile that made me blush.

"Thanks again for the pastry, and being a good liar," I joked.

"Anytime. Night Astoria." and he waved.

I walked to the Ravenclaw portrait hole, thinking about all that had happened. I was also thinking of Evan. He was very kind to me tonight, and he is quite good looking. I felt a type of security when I was with him, and it was a good feeling. It almost felt wrong to think of him when I'm not over Draco... but I need to move on somehow. Evan might be the that "somehow"...a new start.

* * *

*_Draco's POV*  
_  
I was tossing and turning like an 8 year old getting over a nightmare. God the affect she has over me is unbelievable. Her hair, nose, eyes, scent, skin, the color of her blush...all of it just throws me. The fact that I am still interested in her, but she wants to get over me hurts. She is a pureblood, but she's completely different from her family. It's almost like she she doesn't fit in. She's not on Slytherin, and lets face it I can't date non-Slytherin girls without being disowned. She also doesn't like the fact that I'm a death eater, and unfortunately...I am who I am. The only reason I was interested in her last year was to have some fun...or at least...that's what I have been trying to convince myself.  
Yet something was wrong with all this. There was something I wasn't getting at. That maybe it wasn't her...it was me.  
All this was bringing back emotions from that night.

* * *

_*Draco's POV*_

_(5 Months Earlier)_

Panting. We need to get out of here, before the aurors come. I felt an odd sense of sadness. Even though this place is a dim wit school, I was leaving behind memories.

_But I'll be making far better memories once I get out of here. I'll be making something of myself. I'll be fighting next to the Dark Lord, and not trying to fight against him like the idiotic Potter lovers who think they stand a chance. _

_"Come Draco, hurry up!" said my aunt Bellatrix._

_We were now passing the great hall._

_"Attack them!" screamed aunt Bellatrix_

_Some stupid Ravenclaws were at the wrong place at the wrong time. How ironic that they are suppose to be the smart ones. But I soon realized that among the Ravenclaws was a mass of curly dark hair with a pale face. A rush of panic washed through me._

_"No leave them!" I shouted._

_They all turned to look at me._

_"Draco stop interfering."_

_"They're not worth it! Let's just go!"_

_"Stop being so paranoid we have plenty of time to have a little more fun..."_

_"The Dark Lord said to do our mission and leave!"_

_She gave one of her defeated scowls, turned away from the Ravenclaws. I knew her weak points. Once she was reminded of the Dark Lords wishes, she would remain loyal to them.  
Walking away, I managed to glance back. What I found wasn't what I expected. Astoria's face...pain. She stared at me as if she were watching a loved one die before her. The look on her face ripped me apart, and it almost made me stop and turn around, but I didn't. _

_5 minutes later I glanced back making sure she didn't follow me. But her face...that look on her face, it never left me._


	7. Never Meant To Be

I do not own Harry Potter

* * *

_ Astoria's POV_

_(2 months later)_

"Your hands are so soft."

I blushed, "Um thanks..." _  
_  
Christmas went by faster then it came. I didn't go home for the holidays, nor did I want to go home, so I stayed here. Coincidentally Evan stayed for the holidays as well, and we got to know each other. I found out Evan's life is sort of like my own. We are both outcasts in our family. But this is pretty much the only thing I have in common with him.

We were walking hand in hand in Hogsmeade. Evan had asked me to go to Hogsmease with him as a date, but I wasn't sure if that meant we were a couple...

"So where would you like to go first? The Three Broomsticks perhaps?" he asked.

"I don't really care, you choose," I replied.

I turned my face up to smile at the sky, and little specks of snow touched my face.

He looked at me with a confused expression, "What are you doing?"

"Just admiring the snow," I replied

"You like the snow? I'm not really much of a fan of this type of weather."

"Oh, well I like it. This is much better then heat."

"Really? Hot weather appeals to me more," he said.

"I burn easily in the sun."

"Oh," was all he said.

Okay were we seriously just talking about the weather?

We walked in silence, but I preferred silence considering our conversations were getting awkward.

"Here we are," he said.

Not really paying attention, I looked up and noticed we had arrived at the Three Broomsticks. We walked in and found a table in the corner, and sat twiddling our thumbs until the waiter then came to take our order.

"Two butter beers please," Evan ordered for us.

After we ordered I noticed Evan was looking over at another table.

"What are you looking at?" I asked curiously.

"Who is that sitting with Malfoy?" he asked without looking at me.

The mention of Malfoy caught my attention. I followed Evan's gaze, and looked over to see Malfoy sitting with a girl. She happened to be a very pretty girl at that. The scene of Malfoy's hand on her leg, and his body being quite close to hers stung me more then I wanted to admit.

"I don't know who she is," I said coldly and looked away.

"Do you think she goes to Hogwarts?" Evan asked still not looking at me.

"I've never seen her before," I said, getting annoyed.

"Do you think she's going out with-"

"Why dont you go over and ask her yourself!?"

I left the table and stormed out of my seat without a glance back. Evan didn't try to go after me either. I accidentally ran into the waiter who had our butterbeers.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

All I could comprehend was the wet butter beer liquid that had spilled all over me. I felt the blood rush to my face, got up, and ran out, ignoring the gasps and giggles behind me.

* * *

_Draco's POV_

"So let me know once your done babysitting the castle, and we can meet up again," she whispered in my ear seductively.

"You'll be the first to know," I lied, and then walked away.

I wasn't going to pursue her. There were many girls like her that were in line for me to shag. She would be just a waste of my time.

I didn't exactly want to go back to the castle, so I decided to walk on a nearby trail. It was nice to be alone for once, and it was quite pleasant when it was snowing.

I walked for a while not really paying attention to anything, when I saw a figure sitting on a rock in the distance. I noticed the dark shiny curls and the pale skin, and I knew it was her. Without thinking I walked closer. At first I just stood there admiring her beauty until I finally decided to speak.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

She jumped when she heard my voice. Her eyes widened and she blushed a deep pink. I felt satisfaction knowing that I'm the only one that can make her blush like that.

Astoria sighed, "Minding my own business, you should try it sometime."

"Your the one who looks like a freak just sitting here." I snapped.

My eyes wondered to the bright orange stains on her clothing.

"Did you spit up on yourself?" I teased.

"What? Didn't you notice my grand exit out the Three Broomsticks? Maybe you should go snog your girlfriend instead of picking on me," Astoria retorted.

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

"The girl you were sitting with at the Three Broomsticks" Astoria said.

Ah I see where shes getting at.

"She's not my girlfriend, but she shags decently I suppose."

"Are you just using her for your own pleasure then?" she asked.

I smirked, "Maybe, but then again thats none of your concern."

She shook her head, "Your sick."

I ignored her comment.

"Hey don't go chastising me when you've been dating around yourself. You've been seeing that Lewis guy haven't you?" I asked.

"I guess you can put it that way," she replied.

A twinge of jealousy poked at my insides, and I tried my best to keep my voice even.

"Well I guess he's the type of goody-goody you've always wanted."

"Actually, I don't think I'm going to be interacting with that 'goody-goody' anymore. He's probably tracking down that girl you were with."

"Huh?"

"He was paying extra attention to your veela during our date at The Three Broomsticks." she explained.

"Is that why your just sitting here?" I asked.

She said nothing, but I took that as a yes.

Without thinking I blurted out, "Well your too pretty for him anyway."

I regretted saying that instantly, but for the first time in a long time, she looked at me directly with those wide eyes of hers.

"I'm not here for your pleasure like those other girls you shag. I'm not interested in playing your games, so go find some slut somewhere else," she stated.

I didn't want her to think that, that's what she meant to me, because we _were_ more than that.

"I...I'm not playing any games, because it's the truth. You're too pretty for your own good."

She stood up and walked closer to me, with a confused look. That's when it hit me. If she takes another step I know where this will lead. I want it, but she needs something more then I can give her. We were not meant to be, and thats why I turn around and left her there.


	8. Realization

Astoria's_ POV_

It was nearing February and I had done by best to avoid Malfoy at all costs. For the past 2 months it's worked…until today.

I was having a quiet breakfast in the great hall when a letter plopped into my eggs. I hesitantly examined the letter as if it were a bomb, which would seem amusing to most, but I rarely received mail. I realized it was from my "beloved" parents, which was even more usual since I could not remember the last time they wrote me while I was at Hogwarts.

As I read their message I felt a saddening frown creep on my face, and discovered the horror in what they wrote.

_"We have decided that you are to come back home during Easter holiday, and not go back to Hogwarts….we need to be at service to the dark lord….no arguments…"_

I wasn't fully aware of my actions in the following minutes, but I had ripped the letter into shreds and ran out the hall.

I couldn't go back to them. Hogwarts was the place to be away from their absurdness. I started to have conversations in my head….

"Should I just not go back on the train?"…... "No they would come to Hogwarts and make me leave once they found out…"

"Should I run away?..."Run away where? You have no where to run away too!"

I found myself at the edge of the Lake. The air was icy-cold but I ignored it. Tears streamed down my face, and I felt myself breaking.

My life was over. I wanted nothing to do with the dark lord. I didn't want to go back to my parents. And I felt even more pathetic when I realized that I didn't want to leave, because **he **was here, and being here was the only way to be with **him. **

The mourning over my pathetic life was interrupted when I heard some leaves crunch behind me. Had someone followed me here? Since Snape was made headmaster, Hogwarts is left without protection to dark creatures. Panic took over as I got out my wand defensively.

"WHOSE THERE?!" I shouted.

I let out a startled gasp as Draco stepped out from a tree, and rolled his eyes.

"You know, someone with half a brain would know that it isn't safe being out here alone," he chided.

"No one asked you to protect me, so why don't you just go back to your death eater's and leave me alone," I retorted.

He stared at me for a few seconds and realized the red puffyness of my eyes.

"Why are you crying?"

I was brought back to reality and felt my eyes stinging.

"Why do you care?"

"I don't. But I bet it's because your boyfriend broke up with you," he teased.

Now I was livid.

"First of all I don't have a boyfriend! And if you're really so curious about my upset state then here you go. My parents want me to join a cause that I don't believe in. They want me to leave the place I call home so that I can go around and wear retarded hoods. Well, I'm sorry to inform you Malfoy, but I don't want to be a monster like you and your friends. It's surprising, I know, but not everyone finds torturing people with fear fulfilling. Sometimes I don't even know how you can live with yourself!"

He gave me a look that I have never seen from him before, and it was almost scary.

"You. Know. Nothing. You're a freaking goody-goody know-it-all! Do you think I actually wanted to live like this? Do you even know what it's like to fear for your life every day, because one screw up can cost you everything? I haven't had a good night's sleep in months, while you get to live your carefree life bitching about things like how you don't get along with your parents?"

He stormed off and left me speechless. I did notice the unstable look about him since our 6th year, but never got a glimpse of his fear until this point. Before I knew it I was running after him.


End file.
